"When someone dies that has been in your life since the day you were born, your world goes dark. You feel shut out from the world, from everything, your friends, your family. It's like you are in a box or a dark tunnel by yourself. You feel like you're the only person in the world going through it."

— Megan, 18

"What we have once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us."

— Helen Keller

What Is Happening?

Grief is a natural and normal response to the loss of a loved one, although when someone close has died, nothing really seems normal at all. Part of the process of grief is learning how to live in the "new normal" of our lives. In this process, grieving children and families need support. This support can be especially helpful coming from other grieving children and families, those who are going through the same experiences. Grief itself is rooted in love, and over time we discover that while death has taken our loved one from us, the love lives on inside us.

When someone we love dies, a hole is torn through the family and each member of the family. No matter how young or old we are, we grieve the death of the one we love.

At the Highmark Caring Place, we believe that grief is a natural and normal response to the loss of a loved one. But just because it's natural and normal doesn’t mean that children (or adults) just "get over it." When someone so close has died, nothing seems normal. Not just the person himself or herself is gone; it often feels like much of life itself as we have known it is also gone. Part of the process of grief is learning how to live in this new life, this "new normal."

Grief is natural and normal, but it's not easy. In addition to the hard work that is involved, many children (and again, adults as well) feel very alone in the midst of their grief. Since they often don't know anyone else, especially of their own age, who has gone through something like this, they feel like they're isolated, different. Alone.

Grieving children and families need support — support from other children and families going through the same things, feeling the same feelings, understanding each other because they too have experienced the death of someone they loved very deeply.

We grieve because we loved (and love still). Grief is born from the loss of a love relationship. Grief only comes to those who love and have opened their hearts to love.

Grief is rooted in love.

Grieving is allowing the pain of our losses to enter our hearts. True healing begins the moment we can face the reality of our losses and broken-heartedness.

As we journey in grief we discover that while death has taken our loved one from us, the love lives on inside us.