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Candle Lighting Lanterns

Suggested Group(s): Teen

Purpose: To provide an opportunity to share memories and memorialize the person who died; to create a group ceremony or ritual.

Task/need: Converting the relationship from presence to memory, living on the grief spiral, relate the loss to a context of meaning

Activity Setup Ideas:

  • Discuss the things that people do to memorialize their family members who have died.
  • If candle lighting is not mentioned, tell the group that some people light candles to remember their deceased family members.
  • You may want to discuss the holiday Ceremony of Remembrance that the Caring Place holds as a candle lighting opportunity for families.
  • Talk to the group about creating their own candle lighting ceremony and using aluminum lanterns to protect the candles that are lighted in the group.

Materials:

  • One prepared aluminum rectangle per group member (approx 6"x12")
  • Carpet squares & magazines to provide cushioning
  • Thin nails
  • Hammers (one per group member)
  • Tea light candles
  • Matches or lighter (preferably long handled lighter)

Description: To create the aluminum lanterns to be used in the candle lighting, members will each begin with a thin rectangular sheet of aluminum that has been prepared for use. (By folding the sharp edges over and taping them against the aluminum, you reduce the risk of cuts — this should be done in advance by an adult volunteer.)

Once the aluminum has been prepared, allow the group to design their lantern. Holes will be made in the aluminum to allow the light to shine through. These holes can be the entire design, or can be embellished with markers to create a pattern to memorialize the family member.

Have the group members sketch their design and then create on the metal, using the nails to create holes in the aluminum. Be certain to make the holes from the smooth side towards the side with the tape to create a more finished look.

Once the designs are complete, have the children roll the aluminum to create a tube and tape the ends together from the inside.

Place the lanterns over the tea light candles and light them one by one, announcing the person being remembered in the ceremony. Allow time for sharing and storytelling if the group desires.

Activity Wrap Up Ideas:

  • Provide the group with the opportunity to share stories, thoughts and questions, as they desire.
  • Quietly allow the group time to admire the candles and in their own time, blow out their candles.

Suggestions: Be sure to allow some time to transition from the solemn ceremony to the hectic pace of the forum time after this activity.